"life is what you make of it"

for a long while, i haven't noticed what have i been doing nor have i even cared
for what i will be doing. i just let the day dictate what I should do.

then, one raindy morning, while I was eating my Honey Stars, my mom and I
had a short talk about one of my troubled aunts. we never knew what to make
about her illness. maybe it was depression, maybe something else, it's as good
as anyone's guess. but she then told me that life is what you make of it.

yes, i was enjoying the tastiest stars in the universe and at the same time, it
was as if the universe itself stopped moving. and i came to wonder what do I
make of life. i was living a good life but, even you, could achieve something better...

so much better that it might not be real anymore, much like a fantasy.
but you know what, i have and always been a dreamer. everything could
happen, you just need to time it just right, because there are no second
chances in life.
once it is over, that's it.

my blog's name is wishful thinking for the reason that it describes who i'am.

The noun wishful thinking has one meaning:

Meaning #1: the illusion that what you wish for is actually true
Meaning #2: wishful thinking is the formation of beliefs and making decisions according to what might be pleasing to imagine instead of by appealing to evidence or rationality.

as an idiom:
Interpreting matters as one would like them to be, as opposed to what they really are. For example, Matthew wanted to be a basketball player, but with his height that was wishful thinking. This term comes from Freudian psychology of the mid-1920s and soon began to be used more loosely.

but i realized that i'am not dreaming, i am capable of doing things. i have the ability to turn the tides and move mountains. i have the ability to choose and take action.

and now that i'am wide awake, actually see how beautiful the world really is in its
purest form.

Conan O'Brien

"...although you see me as a celebrity, a member of the cultural elite, a kind of demigod, I was actually a student here once much like you. ... I was, without exaggeration, the ugliest picture in the Freshman Face book. When Harvard asked me for a picture the previous summer, I thought it was just for their records ... I looked like a mackerel that had been in a car accident. You see, in those days I was six feet four inches tall and I weighed 150 pounds. Recently, I had some structural engineers run those numbers into a computer model and, according to the computer, I collapsed in 1987, killing hundreds in Taiwan." — Conan O’Brien, 2000 Harvard Class Day Speech


His father, Dr. Thomas O’Brien, was a research physician at Brigham and Women's Hospital and an associate professor at Harvard Medical School, specializing in infectious diseases. His mother, Ruth Reardon O’Brien, is a former partner of the Boston law firm of Ropes & Gray

After graduating as the valedictorian from Brookline High School (Brookline, Massachusetts), O’Brien entered Harvard University.

Throughout his college career, he was a writer for the Harvard Lampoon humor magazine.

During his sophomore and junior years, O’Brien served as the Lampoon's president, making him only the second person ever to serve as president twice, and the first person to have done it in 85 years.

He graduated magna cum laude from Harvard in 1985 with a concentration in History and Literature.

-if you watch his show, Late Night with Conan O'Brien, you might never know who the guy really is. except maybe as a writer for a school paper..

mistake no. 24

im having difficulty with philo

the main reason is that i try to define things in my own way and understand things according
to my own terms

philo is different though..

although it encourages us to form insights and question things, philo is something that is definite.

it won't understand what you think. you need to understand it for yourself. you need to be in agreement with its terms and conditions..

..then you can start to give your own meaning to it.

you can't go questioning something you don't understand. you ask questions because you already know something, you just want to make sure that you're on the right track.

it's kind of a rigorous mental process that needs patience and faith to whatever is presented, no matter how wild, unbelievable and weird it is.

it doesn't mean that i don't like philo. it only means that in order for me to fall in love into the subject, i need to go through courting.

it's not a love at first sight thing.. i need to take it slow.

that is my mistake number 24, in a list of 100.

pong ping anyone?

20

----------------JULY BABY --------------
Fun to be with. Secretive.
Difficult to fathom and to be understood.
Quiet unless excited or tensed.
Takes pride in oneself.
Has reputation.
Easily consoled.
Honest.
Concerned about people's feelings.
Tactful.
Friendly.
Approachable.
Emotional temperamental and unpredictable.
Moody and easily hurt.
Witty and sparkly.
Spazzy at times.
Not revengeful.
Forgiving but never forgets.
dislikes nonsensical and unnecessary things.
Guides others physically and mentally.
Sensitive and forms impressions carefully.
Caring and loving.
Treats others equally.
Strong sense of sympathy.
Wary and sharp.
Judges people through observations.
Hardworking.
No difficulties in studying.
Loves to be alone.
Always broods about the past and the old friends.
Waits for friends.
Never looks for friends.
Not aggressive unless provoked.
Loves to be loved.
Easily hurt but takes long to recover.
Repost this in the next 5 mins and your reputation will boost someway in the next 12 days

growing up

reading all the stuff I have done, some may ask..
how do you come up with this stuff?

it's pretty simple. i look what's around me.
to be honest, i rarely read books. i also watch less tv nowadys.
it just so happens that i have a fascination of the things happening around me.

in the past, i try not to make any commitments with anything.
responsibility is not my thing.

but after three weeks living in a house.. going to school day in and day out riding a jeep
and eating sardines while your parents are living like royalty at the United States of America.. not my thing either.

i made decisions like i own the house, bought groceries and paid the bills with my own allowance.
hell, i was nearly hold-upped. but luckily, i survived that.

but going through all these, i learned to be responsible not only to myself but to the people around me.

that is why I wasn't ready for love before. maybe I was scared, maybe I was just fooling around. but I'am sure that I was a kid who still knew nothing more than household chores and playing.

with all the responsibility I hold for, more or less unitl sunday, i understood the diffrence of me as a kid and me as a man.

i'am still a kid, but i discovered that a man took responsibility of whatever happens. i was a kid before because i just run away when something bad happens. I just run away and go to my happy place.
now, i could stare the devil in its eyes and take whatever it throws at me.

i'am sorry to all the people who I ran away from. especially those who meant a lot to me.
it's part of growing up. i need mistakes to know what are the right ones.

if that one person could just understand what happened to me. if she knows how to reason.. she will surely understand. but if she doesn't, then i'am just sorry..

come to think of it...

the one word why I can't get my driver's license:
RECKLESS

the one thing that I can't eat:
SHRIMP

if I become president:
I'LL BE DOING THE SAME MISTAKES

the one country I would love to live in
ITALY

hmmm.. these thoughts are quite surprising.

i should stop thinking aloud.

maybe i could forget about writing and just throw away the idea that I could write.